Open Relationships; A fantasy some people think of.  How do you start talking to your partner about having an open relationship? Being pleased by your lover and another simultaneously is extremely erotic.  But what happens when your otherwise reserved partner admits that having a threesome is something they want to experience, not just in their head?  So many questions come up?  Does my partner want to live out this fantasy because I am not satisfying them sexually?  Is this the beginning of the end of our relationship?  Could this be an excuse that my partner is using to walk away from our relationship?

abstract heart people 123rtf

Three’s Company.

Not the sassy sitcom with the two female and sole male roommate from the seventies, we’re talking about what happens when people agree to an open marriage or open relationship?  When two people make the decision to bring in a third (or more) partner can be both exciting and frightening.  To ease that transition, try reading The Threesome Handbook – A practical guide to sleeping with three by Vicky Vantoch.  Her book provides a practical guide to sleeping with three.  It gives perks of the poly-amorous lifestyle, especially how to prevent jealousy and finding the perfect third partner for BOTH of you.

But here are some basic tips for those interested in exploring the threesome lifestyle:

  • Don’t include a friend, family member or co-worker.  (you have to deal with them on a regular basis and if things didn’t go well, you may have created a mess).
  • Do NOT include your ex!
  • Take a trip.  Find someone who is willing and someone you won’t have to see on a regular basis.
  • Remember who the original couple is.  Tend to your partner’s needs and keep in mind that the third person is just extra, not a replacement.  This means that the third person shouldn’t linger in the bed with you and your partner.
  • Reassure your partner.  What you two are doing is for the pleasure of you both. Tell your partner how much your experience turns you on, Your partner is your main priority, so make sure to tell them.
  • Practice safe sex.  Let’s face it, STI’s are still out there and the person you bring into your relationship may have a dormant infection that they didn’t tell you about.  Plus there are so many fun condoms in different textures to choose from.
  • Set up guidelines on what is acceptable and discuss them with your partner BEFOREHAND.

Need more reading material on introducing a third partner into your relationship?  Shop now at

Share your thoughts with us

Visit us on Facebook