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Improving Relationships, One Fucking Couple at a Time

Improving Relationships, One Fucking Couple at a Time

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March 2012

You Want More Ass? Tidy Up Your Place.

If clothes make the man, what does his living space say about him?  I’ve wondered this for a while.  Think about it, if you’ve ever visited a love interest who said all of the right things, smelled and looked great drove a clean looking ride, and when you get to where they live, you are turned off. The place looks a mess.  Wherever you look, you see dirty dishes/laundry/furniture/floor. There is an odor that gets caught in your throat.  You dodge vermin and yet they are so comfortable with living like a slob that they are not bothered by your discomfort, at all.  They could be the sexiest person on Earth, but if that place is a mess, it doesn’t matter how attractive looking they are, or anything — deals off, I’m out.

Trust me, I am in no way a Felix Unger, nor am I an Oscar Madison, but I do fall happily in the middle, keeping sure my place looks neat and lived in.  But what do you do when your potential partner’s place is so unkempt?  Do you stay and start to clean up? Or would you think of excuses to leave?

There really is something extra sexy when you visit someone’s home who you are interested in and discover that not only does it look nicely furnished, but it also smells nice.  It seems to make the sex incredibly better. Sex is sexier when the place is clean

Seems that I am not the only one who thinks this way.  I stumbled across this video recently and it pretty much summed up my thoughts.  If the living space is nice, oh yeah, you will be getting some ass.  But only if the place is nice.

Let’s be honest. If your place is nice, I’m giving up the ass

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March 24 2012 Save 25% Online Sale

Housecleaning.  Hate it.  Taking inventory.  Ugh.

I remember when I used to work in a large department store and my boss told me that I had to clean out and rearrange AND take inventory of a stock room.  WHAT???? Was he kidding?  That stock room was a mess, yet he expected me to get it cleaned up.  He kept using the analogy, “think of it as cleaning out your garage”.  Who was he kidding?  I was nineteen years old, with no car, let alone a garage, so I had no clue what this reference of his was all about.  Man, was I thankful I had a great support staff.  I delegated that task to them.

What does that have to do with pleasure products and other intimate accessories you wonder?  Well…everything!  Fast forward a couple of decades and after visiting some garage sales of my own, on Saturday, March 24, 2012 from 7-9am EST embracedesires.com will have its own “garage” sale, only it will be all online!

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I’m feeling like a kid in a candy store.  Or perhaps more like a sex addict in a sex toy shop.  Man, was I excited to find out that we would be carrying the Booty Parlor brand once again.  Especially that Pink Caviar Body Scrub with Pheromones!  Image

I mean, I love eating caviar.  It reminds me of the lavish holiday parties my former fiance’ would take me to and I would find the servers with the tiny cucumber rounds with a dollop of creme fraiche, topped with caviar and sipping on champagne all while wearing over priced lingerie. mmmmm.  deliciously decadent.

Every time I think of caviar, or have some to snack on, I anticipate incredible sex.  Go figure.  Perhaps that is why I became so turned on when I saw the caviar scrub by Booty Parlor.  Caviar AND pheromones, together?  What better combination?  After all, caviar is filled with essential minerals and nutrients as it makes your skin look great.  Then you have the pheromones attracting the attention of a potential suitor, hey, what could be better?

Ok, so I love the decadent, the luxurious, and the extravagant.  I deserve it all and so do you.  That is why we are proud to offer Booty Parlor to you.

indulge.

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